Me, myself and I

People seem to struggle with "I", "me" and "myself". So which should you use in a particular context? I could go into the grammar of it but I would probably put off many of the people who need to be informed and most of the others would already know. So, let's keep it simple. We can do that because actually most English speakers know the answer, they just may not be asking the right question.

The confusion between "I" and "me" usually occurs when someone else is involved. For example:

"It was a good day for my wife and ??."

Should it be "I" or "me"? The simple test is to take the other person out of the sentence.

"It was a good day for ??."

Is it "I" or "me" now? Well unless you are from the West Country part of England, and I know some of my friends are, it would be:

"It was a good day for me."

Now put the other person back:

"It was a good day for my wife and me."

That was easy.

I think the cause of the confusion comes from another problem that was addressed for many of us either by our parents or in the early years of school: that when there is me and other people in a list, "I" should always come last, so:

"My wife and I had a great day."

Notice though, in this case, if I take the other person out of it:

"I had a great day."

You knew that. I'm tempted to mention grammar, but I'm resisting it.

"myself" is a useful word when you are doing something to yourself, like:

"I was washing myself."

It can also be used to emphasise that it is you, and not your helpers, who is doing it:

"I will clean up the rubbish myself."

And it can mean your normal state of being.

"I'll be back to myself in no time."

It doesn't sound right though to use "myself" when "I" or "me" will do instead.

"Come with Joe and me!"

"Joe and I went to the football match."

We all make little slips when we are talking and they usually pass without incident but when we are writing we should have time to think along these lines and correct ourselves.

Pet hates - language

This isn't your normal blog post because I intend to add to it over time expressions I hear which really annoy me. I'm not really the Mr Grumpy type. I don't necessarily react to neologisms or even to spelling or grammatical errors where they are clearly accidental and don't change the meaning of the message.

What's more I admit I am not immune myself and I am very wary of Muphry's Law. In fact, don't hesitate to pick me up on my errors; I'll try not to react badly but I will always take notice.

Here's the current state of the list.

• "One of the only..." as in "It is one of the only such bridges left in the country." This is meaningless. It may be "one of the few" or it may be "the only one"; make up your mind.
• "One year anniversary". I've dealt with this one before, here.
• "Me, myself and I". Which to use? See the dedicated article here.
• The greengrocer's apostrophe. This article is not exactly a how to. It's more of an anecdote.
• Here's another article on apostrophes, "its" and "it's" this time.
• Here's an article on my opinion on what is or is not plural.
• An article on my opinion on the difference between gender and sex and how that affects language. Please read the comment I left at the bottom of my own article; no offence is intended to anyone.